Problogger.net is having another contest. It’s a Top 5 list group writing project. I thought I’d give it a shot and post up my own Top 5 list. I’m feeling kinda surly today and do not feel like posting but Lost Ball could use the extra promotion and writing helps get the brain going. So here are the Top 5 Reasons this Writing Contest is Stupid.
1) You’re Not Going to Win. Yea, somebody has to win the Chitika $1,001 grand prize. But it won’t be you. There are so many great writers participating. Some are really creative. Some write well. However, there is no way you are going to impress Darren enough to get your post recognized. You’ll have to either be stupidly funny or maybe wickidly creative with video, poems and sky writing to claim your victory.
2 ) Too many people participating. Nobody is going to read your contest entry. OK nobody is a bit harsh. How about, only 3 extra people are going to read your post than would normally. Now if you want to get people to read your entry you can always sex it up: “Top 5 Reasons Having Sex While Blogging Will Help You Lose Weight”, might get you a few extra eyeballs. It’s just stupid that the only time you can get someone’s attention is by mentioning sex or weight loss. Otherwise your entry just gets stuck between the Top 5 reasons Britney doesn’t wear panties and the Top 5 reasons M&M’s can’t be square. You’ll never be found my friend.
3) It’s a waste of time. Wouldn’t I be better off putting what little brain cells I have in operation to writing a real blog entry? This Top 5 list will hit the archives and not be read again quicker than a click to a free Adsense riches ebook. I suppose, in keeping with the theme of Lost Ball, I could write a Top 5 list of some of my favorite Internet marketing tools like Nichebot, PLR Pro, Affilorama, PortalFeeder/OrwellPro and XSP, but that would be tasteless, what with all the affiliate links and such.
4) Nobody but Darren benefits. Sure some lottery winner will win $700 (you don’t think the IRS doesn’t have a man on the inside do you? Oh yes. They’ll get their cut.) . But otherwise look at all the free publicity you’re giving to ProBlogger.net. Yea it’s a great blog. Full of helpful tips and hints on how to make money blogging. Best-of-breed, blah, blah, blah. Dude probably has the rel=no follow on the posts so you won’t get any link love anyway. They are piggy backing to success on the backs of the little people blogging about push pins and knuckle hair.
5) I sat here all of 10 minutes trying to come up with a 5th entry. That’s stupid. There is so many other things I could have done in that span of time. Like come up with the Top 6 reasons it’s stupid to sit around for 10 minutes trying to come up with a 5th entry in a stupid Top 5 writing contest.
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I wonder if the follow links are enabled. Last time I entered a contest on ProBlogger the results got circulated around causing my blog to jump way up ont he Technorati list. I’m waiting for the day that Technorati drops those links as too old and I drop down to nothing again.
Actually, I would like to see some reviews on how those tools work for you, aff link or not. It would be refreshing to read your honest review of a internet marketing tool instead of all those promotional articles disguised as “reviews” cluttering the serps.
I am impressed how you managed to catch my attention. Especially with your title. It’s a good post with a little humor in it. I was really surprised that you had the guts to join the contest and hit Darren head on.
Still, I would like to inform you that the winner for the contest would be chosen at random. This gives everybody a shot at the prize.
Thanks for your post.
If you have time, why don’t you drop by my post:
http://mobileko.blogspot.com/2007/05/snatch-top-5-tips-on-how-to-be.html
It’s also an entry for the problogger top 5- group writing project. ^^ Goodluck to us all!
I’m enjoying the contest, I will not find focus blog ready to read and targeted content.
glad to know you, I get new friend and more important thing is I learn new thing.
You forgot that the only thing less worthwhile than entering the competition is adding a comment.
Comments really do have “no follow”. Anyway.
“nice post! don’t forget to check mine out!”
You are clever, Your disagreement about the contest makes people come to your side and give you their links. At last ,you are the winner
Great post. It’s funny and pretty darned accurate.
Thanks everybody. It’s a fun contest and I think Problogger is one of the better offerings on the web. I just thought I’d give the whole thing a bit of a razz.
Yea, I made one error though. I meant to say that the link love wouldn’t come from the comments and I wrote “post”. Richard above thankfully pointed that out.
very funny and true – this one should definitely win – i am definitely going to write about your entry
You are so right. Who is going to win when there are over 500 entries and one person judging. Not worth the time. You did get my attention though without the use of sex or weight loss. For some reason I was drawn to only click through to your blog. Maybe because my feelings are the same and I thought, now there is a top 5 I can relate to (although it is really a top 4). Have a great day and blog about something really important like Britney Spears or why Lindsay Lohan is off the wagon again. Or about sex and weight loss or sex and weight loss. Bye.
You’re right in that title is everything. I thought about titling mine “5 ways to get rich while having sex and losing weight– SIMULTANEOUSLY”
but I couldn’t think of a good #1.
Therefore, I wrote about something else entirely.
Haha, well I might not win the money but I certainly got lots of link-love.
That was funny. My entry is the opposite of yours:
http://www.canimakebigmoneyonline.com/index.php/20070509-top-5-reasons-you-should-participate-in-problogger-group-writing-projects/
It’s funny because it’s true. I tried today to hopefully find new bloggers, in the end I just ended up being my dumb self with my regular readers, scaring off the problogger crowd
That’ll do pig… that’ll do. Man, I’m rolling on the floor laughing. That was really great. Love it.
Stop by and check out my entry if you have a chance. I won’t say good luck, because… well you won’t win. Top 5 Tantalizing Blog Title Techniques
Haha, aren’t you the pessimist.
Your post caught my attention, too, so here’s one more comment and possibly one more link for you. There’s always room for a little irony!
Best Top 5 Post ever.
It gave me a brief chuckle.
Hey – you’re such a curmudgeon. I love it! What you just had the brass ones to write here – this is how my mind works “in secret.” Nice going. Clever blogger!
Dina
okay, i cracked up at this, even though i really like darren’s stuff and i had fun participating in the contest. too funny.
LOL, clever way to catch everyone’s attention.
You make some good points here . I got a little traffic from my entry on Jackie Chan, but not as much as I hoped. The trick is to 1) Choose a good title and 2) appear at the top of that huge list.
(If your readers want to appear at the top of the next list, they need to submit immediately after Darren does his daily wrap-up.)
You are wrong about the nofollow issue though. And you should have checked this yourself before making the accusation.
your half-assed post really attracted some attention!
Thank you so for stopping by and COMMENTING Chris… I really do appreciate that! I am REALLY lost in the weeds
Very very clever and catchy title. Drama makes everyone respond or peaks everyone curiosity. Problogger is already famous so actually this is helping others get traffic and find interesting blogs like this one.
Good luck on the contest even if you don’t want it.
Hi, enjoyed your writing. I wasn’t going to enter, but I did.
After reading your Top Five List I have a self-esteem issue.
I am a:
1. Dope
2. Idiot
3. Fool
4: Dork
5: __________ fill in the blank.
Well aren’t you the king of snark. As pointed out by others, the winner is chosen randomly, so you do have a chance, even if it is only 1 in 1000.
I like these contests, but only in moderation. Too much of this rubbish and one’s blog becomes unreadable.
Still, I liked your entry, and I found it a fun thing to do. My entry is titled “Top 5 Science Experiments On Cats”.
Grinchy!? Are you kidding? My college ex gave me a theme song: “You’re a mean one… Mr. Grinch.”
haha …. i totally agreed with you … i was thinking myself halfway through of a good title … then i thought could it actually benefit the participants or it’s a smart tactic deployed by darren to get absolutely free huge traffic …
of course we do not know if darren deploy nofollow to all the links … so i decided to post a top-5 topic related and benefits my “own readers” … i can see now how little (almost negligible) traffic can i get from this contest – it’s really stupid …
but the contest actually gave me the inspiration to write something i never thought of … i hope darren would not be so mean to put a nofollow for each participant …
anyway, it’s a good experience in learning all the tactics from all the bloggers out there …
cheers …
They aren’t.
Nice post. Good way to get some attention.
You have a very negative attitude regarding many affiliate things here. You need to take a more positive approach if you ever want to get anywhere with this field. That is all… best of luck to you though.
I’ll keep that in mind Mitur. And thanks.
Well done Splork, impressive. You may not know it, but you are a good writer.
Thanks Franck. Appreciate it.
Phew, I read your blog fairly regularly. Thought I’d check in today because I haven’t read it in a while and when I saw the headline “Writing Contest is Stupid” I thought you were talking about the My-Name-Is-Harry writing contest. I hope you don’t consider it dumb too. I think it’s a more creative idea than a top 5 list. Not sure your blogging, internet marketers would be interested, though there is an associated affiliate sales contest.
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