I still have nothing good to say. This post continues my whining over the guberus and their shitty product offerings. Today it seems we are revisiting what worked 3 years ago. The product is called Search Engine Phantom. It is a boxed set of the best of ‘04 and ‘05. Nothing like wringing out the last bit of profit from a product that has long since seen it’s heyday. Much like The Best of Def Leppard or something.

This time we have, get ready for it, Traffic Equalizer. TE was the bomb a couple of years ago. Grab some keywords, load them up, push a button and before you know it 10,000 spammy websites were deployed to the Internet. Big money. Fast money, was made using this tool. Google killed it last year. Yes, you might get some play at other (crappy) search engines, but if you want Google traffic, this is not your tool. Note how the expectations have been ratcheted down:

“Assuming you used 1,000 keywords and each one brought in 25 visits a month (a conservative number), your website would ultimately receive 25,000 unique and highly targeted viewers on a monthly basis!“

Also included is RSS Equalizer. This is “Power Ingredient #2″. Uh yea. How many free RSS builders are there now? Anyway, the idea is you get fresh content rotating through your site daily. Spinning RSS feeds through your website worked like 3 months. Shoot, I built whole sites using nothing but RSS feeds and they did just fine until Google figured out that what I was providing my “readers” was utter shite.

Moving along to “Power Ingredient #3″. That would be Sitemap Equilizer. Uh huh. A sitemap builder. Does anyone even bother submitting their sitemap to Google anymore? If so, why? Web 2.0 links or article writing helps index your site just fine. I guess it helps make Google think your site is user friendly and webmaster competent. Well anyway it’s in this package. Good thing too since there are only like 88 million websites listed in Google when you search for Google Sitemap. Would hate for you to have to do without.

“Power Ingredient #4″. SEO Spider. This little jewel lets you know how many pages are ranked on your site, Google PR, Alexa rank…zzzzzzzzzzz. Marketleap.com does a lot of what SEO Spider costing a fraction of what this package does. How does nothing grab you? I’m sure there are other free tools available to get the information SEO Spider provides. I just don’t know why you should care. Too bad for you if your site only has a PR 2 or an Alexa ranking of 679,000. How exactly is that knowledge going to help you? Were you planning on doing less work if your site was a PR4 or ranked 25,830?

This package would have been truly awesome to have about three years ago. Now it’s just sad. You’d be better off using the $97 to outsource some link building or purchase some groovy articles.